


Uncertainty

by indevan



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fluff, M/M, Worry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 02:18:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13261533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indevan/pseuds/indevan
Summary: Mostly he couldn’t quite puzzle out what his brother coming back meant.  Kakarrot was the only one who tried to include him with the others and he encouraged him to train with him, but was it out of pity?  Was it because he knew Raditz had nobody?  And what did it say about him that he went and married one of the androids created to destroy his brother?





	Uncertainty

“Tilt your head back.”

Bardock did as he was told, closing his eyes as he did.  Raditz poured the cup of water on his son’s hair to wash out the shampoo.  He was aware of his husband standing in the doorway of the bathroom even if he wasn’t able to sense his energy.

“What is it, Sevs?” he asked without turning around.

“Your brother is coming back.”

Raditz’s hand clenched around the cup and he felt the plastic crack.

“Shit,” he grumbled.

Bardock sat up and blinked at him.

“What was that, daddy?”

He winced and shook his head.

“Nothing, Bardy.  Nothing.”

He tossed the ruined cup away, not caring that the residual water sprayed out.  He glanced over his shoulder to see Seventeen leaning against the doorframe, his arms folded over his chest.

“It’s only for a day.”

“One day after seven years.” He made a contemplative face and added, “I’m curious as to what he’s like.  I never got to meet him, if you recall.”

“Yeah.”

Raditz turned his attention back to the tub.  Bardock picked up one of his toy animals and moved it through the sudsy bath water.

“Rar, rar…”

He heard the soft pad of feet on the tile and then Seventeen was leaning against his back, arms gently looped around his neck from behind.

“And how do you feel about it?” he asked.

He shrugged. “I dunno.”

“You don’t know?” His thin brows rose. “I seem to remember you crying and saying you were alone now with no one to give a shit about you.”

“That word again,” Bardock said, screwing his face up. “What’s that mean?”

“Nothing,” they said in unison.

Raditz shook his head.

“It’s different now.  I have you and Bardy and.  That’s all I need.”

It was true enough.  Mostly he couldn’t quite puzzle out what his brother coming back meant.  Kakarrot was the only one who tried to include him with the others and he encouraged him to train with him, but was it out of pity?  Was it because he knew Raditz had nobody?  And what did it say about him that he went and married one of the androids created to  _ destroy _ his brother?

Not that he could picture Seventeen being that destructive now.  And, besides, couldn’t the same be said about him?  He was a destructive force: one of the few survivors of the most powerful race in the universe.  He made entire planets tremble.  Okay--Vegeta and Nappa made planets tremble but he  _ helped. _

Now here they were in their little house in the woods, with their son.  What would Kakarrot say?  He’d probably be happy.  He’d smile and invite them to dinner and do all that he did before and.

Did he want that?

Maybe.  Part of him was still a bit embarrassed by his life as it was now.  What his father would say.  They were a race of warriors.  Times when his father actually came home were few and far between.  His mother would be happy for him but she was a special case.   _ He _ was happy, though.  He wouldn’t trade the life he had now for the one he had before, but what kind of Saiyan did that make him?

Bardock started to kick his legs and splash water everywhere.  Seventeen recoiled back, taking Raditz with him.  He toppled backwards, landing on top of his husband and possibly suffocating him with his hair.

“Bardy, stop!” he said as he struggled to right himself.

Immediately, the three-year-old let up.  Behind him, Seventeen sat up and hooked a finger into his mouth to pull out strands of Raditz’s hair.

“Sorry, Sevs,” he said, wincing.

He waved a hand.

“Indestructible cyborg, remember?  And I’ve gotten used to you rolling over in your sleep and smothering me with your hair.”

“Oh, oops.”

He studiously avoided the earlier topic of conversation as he pulled the stopper out of the tub and wrapped Bardock up in a towel.  He was still small enough to be completely engulfed in it and he peered out with eyes as piercing and inquisitive as Seventeen’s.

“Daddy, you okay?” he asked.

“I’m good.  Step out.”

He lifted his leg but it still wasn’t quite enough to step out of the tub so he lifted him up into his arms and carried the terry cloth bundle out into his room.  After he was born, they got a capsule house from Bulma to expand their home so they had an actually proper bedroom and Bardock got his own room.  It was another symbol of how much he had changed.  Part of him wondered if Vegeta felt this way, with his new life, but he never asked.  They were never close in that way (he was his Prince, Raditz was his subject) and even if they were, he wouldn’t tell him.

Bardock stood in the middle of his room and let himself be dried off and put him in his pajamas.

“Can we play?” he asked, peeking out from the towel as Raditz dried his immense amount of hair.

“No, it’s bedtime.”

He schooled his features into a pout and crossed his arms.

“Sorry, Bardy,” he said. “No negotiation.  It’s bedtime.”

He tossed the towel towards the door to put it with the other laundry and carried Bardock to his bed.  He tucked him in and kissed his forehead gently.

“My turn.”

He hadn’t heard Seventeen come up but he bent down to kiss Bardock’s cheek and smiled at him fondly.  Sometimes Seventeen told him that he couldn’t believe the life he had when he was altered and engineered to kill.

Hmm.

Maybe he  _ would _ understand.

After Bardock was tucked in and on his way to falling asleep, the two of them left the room.

“He looks so much like you,” Seventeen said, not for the first time.  He laced his fingers and stretched his arms over his head, arching his back as he did. “It’s uncanny sometimes.”

“He has your eyes,” Raditz pointed out, also not for the first time.

It was sometimes disconcerting, seeing those piercing, perceptive, icy blue eyes peering out from a face that otherwise looked like his own.

“He does,” he agreed.

It was as close as they got to talking about it.  Seventeen didn’t like talking about how their son came to be.  How Gero lied to him when he said he would give him the body he wanted.  He said he didn’t regret their son and he loved him like nothing else but that he would never go through it again.

“We aren’t talking about that, though,” Seventeen said. “We’re talking about you.  And your brother.”

Raditz closed his eyes and leaned against the wall.  Of course they were back on it.

“Can we drop it?” he asked. “I don’t know  _ what _ it means, alright?”

Kakarrot would be pulled fifteen different ways by his friends and his wife and children--shit, he never did get to meet Goten, did he?--and they would enjoy the tournament and he would leave.  Maybe he would be impressed that he finally could become a Super Saiyan.

Seventeen put a hand to his cheek. “Let’s play a game.”

He quirked a brow.  Usually when his husband suggested a “game,” it was something new to try in the bedroom.  He wasn’t sure what that had to do with their current topic of conversation.

“What kind of game?”

“The kind where we figure out what you want this to mean.”

He groaned.  Definitely not his kind of game.

“It’s not even about me,” he said. “I’m, like, tenth down on the list of people he’s missed, probably.  It won’t matter.”

Raditz turned from him and walked towards their bedroom.  Usually after Bardock went to bed, they had some time to themselves but, right now, he just wanted to go to sleep.

“Then if it doesn’t matter, why are you upset about it?”

He cringed at Seventeen’s sound logic.  He was right, because he was always right.  Sometimes, he missed the days when his husband was one of their enemies--a wild anarchist who did anything for a thrill.  It was a fleeting thought, just like when he wished that he was like he used to be: a ruthless Saiyan, or at least playing pretend at being one.  Nappa always  _ said _ he took after his mother, and now he didn’t see it as a bad thing.

Yet.

Shit, his mind was a tangled fucking mess.  He trudged into their bedroom and slumped down on the bed.

“Stop being so smart,” he grumbled into the pillow.

“Impossible.”

He couldn’t see him but he  _ knew _ Seventeen was grinning at him.  He felt his hand stroke down his back and he arched into the touch.

“My brother would be happy for me,” he said finally.

“And?  That’s a bad thing?”

Raditz sighed and buried his nose further into his pillow.

“Yes...no...I don’t know.  Kakarrot tried so hard to make me part of his family and all this and it’s only after he dies that I get the fucking memo.”

“That’s because it wasn’t him you needed to teach you that.”

He lifted his head up to look at Seventeen in the relative darkness of their bedroom.

“What do you mean?”

Seventeen pressed himself against him and looped his arms around his neck as best as he could.

“I mean it wasn’t  _ just _ you being a stubborn ass that kept you from being able to make those connections.  It takes more than just blood to make family.”

Raditz knew he was talking about Sixteen without actually talking about Sixteen, which was how it usually went.  He never brought it up, but he knew that he never properly got to mourn his friend and hadn’t even been able to be there to say goodbye.  He also knew, though, that Seventeen didn’t want it brought up.

“So you’re saying we were trying to force it?”

“Exactly.” He pressed his forehead against Raditz’s, his skin cool against his. “You had to let it come naturally after fighting it for so long.”

As usual, his husband was perceptive beyond belief.  He had talked a little about it over the years, but here was: plain as day.

“Oh.”

Again, he wondered if Vegeta felt this same way but he pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind.  If he did or didn’t, it had nothing to do with Raditz.

“It was all screwed up in your head,” Seventeen continued, “But now it’s not.  And you aren’t sure what it means.”

He reached out to stroke his finger down the high tilt of his cheekbone.

“How do you know so well?”

“Because it was the same with me.”

Seventeen put his mouth on his, then, letting his lips linger between each kiss.  Raditz pulled him close so he could lose himself in his mouth, his hair, his scent--everything.

“So now you’re all good and horny, hmm?”

His husband wasn’t letting him off that easily and he groaned.

“I hate talking,” he grumbled.

“Poor baby.” Seventeen pouted exaggeratedly. “But, how about this?  Your brother’s coming back.  He’s going to be happy to see you and see that you’re happy.  He won’t be pissed that it took him dying to do it and you’ll have a nice day.”

“Sure we will.” He ran his tongue over his canine for a moment, considering his next words. “Thanks.”

“Of course.”

He figured, on some level, that this was what married couples  _ did. _  So much was still new to him--and Seventeen too, really, but at least he had a basis for it--but he liked it.

“You feel better?”

“I do, actually.”

Seventeen grinned, a flash of white teeth in the dark. “Good.”

He kissed him once more and, after that, there was no more reason to talk.

**Author's Note:**

> http://vertigoats.tumblr.com


End file.
